(More) Workplace Photos

Look what they did to my BABY!

So it finally happened. My car was finally damaged (beyond a nail in my tire) at work. Because I know how sensitive we all are about my complaining at work, this post is *censored* so as not to piss anyone *cough* my wife *cough* off...but here we go.

I was sitting at my desk, working...when my boss-in-law comes high tailing it into the office. Apparently he got into a (usual) heated "debate" with someone trying to sell him some pallet shelving. There's an iron gate on our front door and he closed it quickly, locking this individual out of our office.

Words were said.

I didn't think much of it (as I work in a kind of DMZ). I went about my work in peace. A few moments later, my boss was shouting "He's smashing our cars!" Everyone involved (other than myself) being a coward, I shoved passed them and ran outside. This a-hole had been trying to leave the mudhole that is our parking lot/yard and had bumped my car with his giant Truck. That's what happened. The guy wasn't backing into all of our cars for "revenge" but that's what everyone thought. I went out there (no one tried to stop me, as I am insane) and talked to the guy. I didn't get mad because he was cool about it...and he was insured.

I'm getting it fixed Monday on his insurance company's dime (even get a free rental car until it's fixed). Though this story has a happy-ish ending, it could have been a lot worse. Most of the people visiting us are uninsured. That would have meant forking over $500. Yikes. I probably wouldn't have fixed it, now that it's paid off.

This is reason #11793 why I can't help jumpstart the economy by buying a new car (even though I want one). Anyway, even though hardly no one I know *cough* understands this, I'm going to give my car to my baby sister in a few years and I don't want it any more screwed up than it already is.

I know it's not that bad, but look what they did to my baby:

Trying to be positive...

Oh boy.

Today my workplace received an inspection from a major government institution. I won't get into the details, for privacy issues...legal issues...and the fact that I know people from my family read this blog--but I will say this: we DID NOT PASS our inspection.

Things are crazy up there, and we may all soon be in a lot of trouble.

That's all I can and will say at this point. There are some people I was discussing this with, but I've decided I'm not going to talk about this. With anyone (including my wife).

A new job is becoming increasingly less of an option...and more of a requirement.

Where I work

My boss had me bring my camera to work (he has some machinery/equipment he wants to sell online). Anyway, I know there is some (moderate) curiosity among my family about where I work and what it's like. SO, I took a few extra pictures.

Our main drive:

Our fabulous back-dock area:

"My" office and "my" desk (I don't consider it my desk, and for the record that's not my mess on it):

Our "break-area":

Here's a picture of the inside of the warehouse, at first I didn't understand why it looked so "snowy." Then I realized my flash was catching tiny bits of dust/dirt/wood debris floating in the air. I'm pretty sure I should wear a mask when I go in there (this stuff is not visible to the eye, by the way):

I found this truck cabin, just sitting there by our dock. No one I talked to had any idea about it's history (or how the fuck it got like it is):

This is a door to a building that no longer exists (it's just a pile of glass and boards):

A view of our "office" from the back dock-area:

Click any of the above pictures and explore my world!

Hey Guess what?

I quit.

I'm sitting here at work...YES, I KNOW IT'S MY DAY OFF (don't ask). Anyway, don't ask me how or why (okay, ask!!! ask!!!)but for some reason I found the courage to do the wrong/dumb thing.

I told me boss that May 16 would be my last day. Thus giving me two weeks to secure employment (or be forced to work for my father in-law). If by this time next week, I still haven't found anything...I'm going to do the one thing I really don't want to do--and that's get another security job. But hopefully it won't come to that.

Why did I quit? Well yesterday I found out that I'm not really going to be working very much this month. They weren't going to tell me until the last minute, but I found out anyway and confronted my boss about it. I was like, "Can you tell me when I work this month?" So he printed me off a sheet--it was pathetic. I had an entire WEEK OFF (middle of the month). All of this because of the graduation ceremonies that effectively close the gym. They don't need me for those, because they hire UMSL police to work security for those events. I knew UMSL had their ceremonies here, what I didn't know was that nearly every local High School rents this place out, too.

So that, combined with the new "Summer-Let's-Fuck-Jason-Over Schedule" left me with little choice but to seek other employment. I thought, "If this month is going to be tight anyway, why not just go do something else?" The decision was basically made for me.

Anyway, I just got done applying for a bunch of jobs. I doubt anything will come of it...but I sure am hoping.

A (Probable) New Job

Well I had my interview today, and it went pretty well. The lady basically told me I had the job (if I wanted it), but that H.R. had to be the one to offer the position to me. She said they'd either call me later today or Monday. There are many factors that make this job better than the one I have now, let me count the ways:

1. Money. Let's be realistic, it's important. My salary will only increase by twenty-five cents, yes...HOWEVER, I'm going to be working 40 hours a week EVERY week. This is important because currently I work 35 hours a week--however I have only worked that much a couple of times (because of holidays, special events, etc.). So if you factor in the extra hours and the raise, it's much more money.

2. More experience doing something that's NOT security work. The new job requires nearly a month of training, all of which is paid for (and I'm to be paid to attend). This includes a CPR/First-Aid class, conflict resolution/avoidance, and a "Masters-level course" specifically pertaining to who I'll be helping...

3. Which brings up the third point: I will be helping people (which is what I wanted to do).

So what is this job? Well, essentially I'm going to be doing Social Work. I'll be a "Supported Employment Technician." The organization I'll be working for (non-profit) helps both children and adults who suffer from Autism. The people they help run the gambit of functionality, but the people I'll work with will all be those who are able to hold a job in the community. I'll be placed with people in my area, who I will take to work...I'll hang out, make sure that they're able to do their jobs. Four hours a week I have to spend in the office working on the case files/reports, but the rest of the time I'll be in "the field" helping these people try to live a normal life. I'll need chauffeur's license (which I think is funny), and I will be reimbursed for my travel/gas expenses.

I honestly can't believe I applied for, let alone am seriously considering accepting, such a job. However the benefits are good--more money, new and interesting work, new skills and things I can add to my resume. Plus I'll be doing something that matters more than the usual job. I can't really say that this is something I'd want to do forever, but right now...I feel like I'm pretty much wasting my life...I need to be doing something, anything NOT security work. So there it is.

What sucks: all the extensive training I'll get (which I'm glad is going to be available to me) is done once a month, the next session begins on Monday...which means I'm going to have to wait until next month to start working full time. Which means I'm looking at another 3 weeks at my current job. Also, they pay their people once a month (at the beginning) so I won't get my first full paycheck until June (yeeeessssshhhh!!!). But April is a "three-payday" month for me where I am now...so between that, and Leah's new job starting to pay her this month...we'll survive.

Limemonkey the case-worker, who'd have thought?

Another Interview

Okay, I feel at this point that I should stop telling people I have an interview (this seems to jinks things) but I can't help it--I have an interview on Friday. Yesterday I had someone (a maintenance dude) totally lose his ever-loving-mind on me (for no reason) and I nearly walked out. I mean I really almost got in my car and just drove home. It was bad. I had to call the police.

Anyway, a quick call home to Leah set me straight...but the fire was once again lit under my ass to get a better job. So, this morning I had Leah wake me up, and I went at it (yet again). I have an interview Friday. The job is decent (I'll be getting a $0.25 raise out of the deal) but the most important things is--IT IS NOT A SECURITY JOB. And I'll be helping people. So you know tomorrow I'm getting a haircut first thing!

Everyone please, cross your fingers (or whatever) for me. I really need it.

In other news, my BABY sister Lindsey has a blog now! I know right? They grow up so fast...I'd share the link with you all, but for safety reason it is a private, invitation-only blog. Go Lindsey.

That's about it. I have some really cool ideas for the v-blog...but I am without a partner this week (Leah is off during the day for training at her new job). Also, I have about a 1,000 album reviews I need to work on (maybe I'll do that tonight while Leah is tossing and turning?).

The Interview

Ugh. Well, it went okay. I got up, called the guy when I was supposed to...and the guy was a bit of a spaz. He seemed nervous or something, and there were numerous pauses (on his side of the conversation). We only chatted for about 15 minutes, and in that time he asked me:

1. How I found out about them

and

2. What kind of leadership skills I had

Then he told me I'd get a call in about 2 weeks, to set up my actual face-to-face interview (if they want me). I'm not really holding my breath. I don't think it badly or anything...I just don't think this nervous guy is ever going to get back to me.

So, the hunt continues.

Interview Tomorrow

So tomorrow I have an interview with a non-profit. The job sounds good, requires a degree, and pays nearly $10,000 a year more than what I make now. I'm anxious, but surprisingly not very worried. I feel like this is right, that's about all I can say. I'm hoping that they move me through the hiring process quickly (so far they are, my interview was supposed to be April 1, but they moved it up for me). I just need to get out of my current job.

This is Spring Break week, so we're closing an hour early every day. That's both good and bad. Good: I get to come home early. Bad: We need the money, and even though it's only four hours...well shit, that's $40.

Anyway, I shaved my beard off on Saturday...tomorrow after my (phone) interview, I'm getting a hair cut (if I have a "real" interview, that is). That's how ready to leave this job I am--I'm willing to part with hair. Wow. That's desperate.

HALLELUJAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today Leah got a job. She's going to be doing research at a VERY fancy rich-kid school (the place I wish I'd gone rather than DUMSL...but was/is too expensive). She's going to have hours that virtually mirror mine--but with $2.80 more an hour.



She is so sick (bad sore throat), so she sounds like a frog...but she is a happy frog.

How Many People Did You Help Today?

Me personally, I've helped exactly 0 (zero) people today. I think that may be my problem.

I'm stuck here at work--doing nothing, and I feel like I should be helping someone. I'm not sure how, but I know that my next job needs to involve HELPING people.

I'm going to have to do some research, but there has to be a job like that out there somewhere (and no, I don't want to teach, but thanks for trying!). The thought of just "making money" (for me, or my boss, or my company) frankly: makes me sick. I think this is why I felt so much revulsion when I went in for that sales job. Simply capitalism ain't gonna cut it for this boy.

So I guess now that I know what I want to do, this is the hard part--finding a job that will let me do what I want to do.

I just want to help (in a meaningful way).

My Paychecks Make Baby Jesus Cry...

Yeah, so I'm sitting here...paying bills (which is always a cure for depression, I find). Anyway, all I have left is rent and my car payment. I can't pay them till Wednesday, when I get paid. When I woke up today, I was so happy.

"You're getting paid!"

Yes, yes I am. Unfortunately, after I pay our bills we will only have about $200 (which we have to live on for another 2 weeks until I get paid again). Holy shit, talk about a kick to the nuts. I guess I'm lucky, that there's going to be anything left over.

Leah has a big job interview today (making like triple my current salary). Let's all send her positive thoughts/energy today at 4:00PM.

Two Red Folders

I have two folders. One is what I've been taking to work, with pieces of my novel (and my letter writing material). The other is one I started using today--it's filled with resumes.

Yesterday, at work I got a call about a job I applied for last week. It kinda hit my by surprise. I ended up talking to an HR woman for a really long time. She told me that she liked what she heard, and that I was going to be sent along in the process. She said that if the hiring manager liked what he saw, I'd get an interview. Ten minutes later she called me back and said that if I wanted one, I could interview this morning at 10:00AM. I jumped on the opportunity.

So I went this morning, in my green shirt and black tie (God I hate that tie) and had my interview. The job is a good one. The job will pay me double what I make now, and if I'm able to learn to sell--I could expect to make truck-loads of money. One of the phrases they threw around (a lot) was "100K."

Now, I don't know about you...but that's pretty much beyond anything I ever hoped/expected to make. Fundamentally, it sounds like a very stressful/shitty job. It's cold calling. I would be an I.T. headhunter. This is a good company (been around since 1976). I would get health care. I would be able to work at home--I would HAVE to work at home (50 hours a week min. but I get paid for overtime, I also would get commissions--but I would also have a base salary).

This is a great opportunity, and yet I don't want to take it deep down. Why? Because I know it would be the final death blow to my writing. I know that if I'm working 50+ hours a week (making "a 100 calls a day" (cold calls)) that I would NOT want to do anything no the weekends. I'm not 100% sure I could do this job, but I could probably get by. Problem is--I can tell that I would have no passion for it.

So I have these two red folders. Neither are very easy or safe/secure options for me. One is an extreme long-shot...the other is still a long-shot. Even though I think it's probably not the smartest choice, I'm not ready to give up on my dreams. I'm not ready to admit defeat on what is more than likely something that will only ever make me feel good (as opposed to something that will make me money). My current job is improving slightly. My boss returned to work yesterday, and things are finally starting to be organized once more.

If this job was even remotely along my interests, I would have no qualms about taking it (were it to be actually offered to me). But it's not. Not really. This, dear children, is why the Limemonkey is in reality a very stupid man. This is also why you will never think of the Limemonkey as a "rich" man. I'd like to think that turning down the possibility of great sums of money, in the name of my passions, said something about me as a man (other than what a fool I am)...but I'm afraid it doesn't say very much.

If you are a mother--thank God I'm not marrying your daughter. If you are a woman--thank God you're not going to be my wife. I foresee much poverty...

This Book Has My Number...

I still can't sleep. One of my favorite things to do is read in the tub, so that's what I was just doing. Because my life seems to only have one theme right now ("Finding a Job"), I was reading one of the books my sister's boyfriend bought me (as a Graduation gift).

I found this particular passage to be, shall we say...eerily accurate--From that perennial classic, I'M AN ENGLISH MAJOR---NOW WHAT? (page 214):

I find that there are two kinds of people who sing the praises of the English major the most: English majors who are secure in a job, and non-English majors who are secure in a job. It's very easy when you're got a job--especially one that puts an English major's talents to use--to talk about how flexible and versatile and tremendously valuable is the major in English.

I suspect that this enthusiasm is not shared by the English majors working as security guards or in an industry they dislike.

Wow, suddenly I don't feel so alone anymore.

If Your Life Isn't What You Want It To Be, Change It

It's nearly 2:00AM and I can't sleep. Tonight was the worst night I've had yet at my new job. I'll spare you the boring details (you're welcome). I don't know what's happened to me. I've always done what I'm "supposed to do," in the humble hope that by doing so "everything will work out fine."

I went to college, because that's what I was supposed to do. There (and in all my years of schooling) I did you work, got good grades, and for the most part kept my head down. That's me, always doing the work--assured by "everyone" that as long as I do that, things will work out.

Well guess what? I got out of school and it turns out that's a load of horseshit. Just keeping your head down, eyes on the prize, "coloring within the lines" doesn't count for anything. No one cares. I don't know what I'm doing wrong, but since December 17 when I graduated I have feel like I haven't done something...like I missed a step. Why is that?

There is no step to miss, it's just that life doesn't follow any sort of "rules." There is no natural next step beyond school. You don't get out and magically become a different, better person. I'm still the same fucked up mess I was prior to getting my diploma (which by the way, STILL hasn't come yet). It's sink or swim out here, and thus far--I feel like I'm wearing lead shoes. I don't know what I'm going to do, but just "keep on, keepin' on" ain't cutting it--not by a long shot.

Sitting home and filling out endless online applications isn't getting me anywhere (7 tonight before I first tried going to bed). My dead-end temporary job is only making me hate myself--and making me miserable. Not because it's dead-end, but because I know, 100% that I am wasted there. I wish I could take the near constant abuse and belittlement, but it's turning me into a monster. There was an incident tonight, and I'm probably going to get a phone call in the morning. When I do, I'm telling them they have two weeks to find another punching bag. I'm done.

I realize that if you're life isn't what you want it to be, you have be a grown-up and make it what you want. The only problem is, I don't know how to do that...the only up-side is, I don't think anyone else really knows how to do it either.

A Little Like Noah (in that, there was a flood)

Remember that fabulous job I was telling you about? Well in case you didn't know, part of my "security" job involves doing laundry. A lot of laundry, actually. For the most part, it's just a bunch of small loads...the gym doesn't get all that much business, but what it gets is steady.

Anyway, during basket ball games it's a different story. Each team takes like 20 towels (aren't there only 13 people on a basket ball team?) which means I end up doing a shit-load of laundry. Of course, the teams (who must have towels) also want to clean their uniforms. The school only has two washers and two dryers...

There was a game on Saturday. It sucked. At the end of the day, I had no clean towels. The machines were used by the teams to clean uniforms, right until closing time. I locked everything up, eager to go home and enjoy some time off...and in my haste I saw that the machines were FINALLY open. So I threw some laundry in the washer and took off.

I'm no stranger to doing laundry, but what I'm NOT used to dealing with is a front loading washing machine. I'm not sure why they have these, actually. Maybe it's just hindsight...but it seems like a bit of a water hazard. Anyway, I went home...the next day I got a phone call. It was the part-time guard, the kid who trained me.

"Uh...hey Jason...uh...when you left yesterday, did you notice a puddle near the track?"

No. I didn't notice any water on the track.

"Uh...well then, I guess I'll call maintenance."

Okay. Great. Sounds like a plan.

I get back to work a day later, and this little "puddle" turned out to be a fucking flood. I don't know if I'm the one to blame, but I know that my colleagues have little doubt. All this happened over last weekend, until today I hadn't heard much about it. Today, when I got to work they gave me a lesson on doing laundry. After which, the dayshift guard told me they were replacing one of the washer door's lock. I'm not sure if it was my fault (I wasn't the last one out Saturday..and there were other people that day doing laundry) but my crappy job just got a bit crappier--as I am now officially known as the guy who flooded the basement.

Great, huh? Ah, notoriety.

Second Day Off

I won't lie, this has been a rough/bad week for me. I really don't feel like getting into it, but my new job sucks the big one. Actually, I take that back...I will get into it. The benefits offered to me at the interview were overwhelming (I get insurance!) but the meager pay and flaky hours (I work 38 hours every week...some weeks (when people take off) I'll get more...but they make me take 30 minute breaks every 4 hours I work. This translates into 3 hours a week so I'm really only working 36 hours a week) are starting to make the deal seem less sweet.

Then there is the humiliation of going to work at UMSL. Where I see people I used to know...and I have to deal with the question, "Why are you here? Didn't you graduate?" Ugh. The kids I work with don't make me feel any better ("Have you thought about writing?" Dead God, help me).

But worst is the work itself, or rather the lack thereof. For starters, I should have realized it wasn't an actual security position when they didn't make me take a drug test or get certified with the Board of Police Commissioners (like Uni-Guard did). My job consists of locking doors and washing towels. Yes, that's right...most of my new job consists of touching mounds of sweaty, dirty, used towels. I do laundry for 7 hours. I take the towels back upstairs and fold them, so they can be handed out again. Ugh. The back of my hands are dry and itchy, as a result of the endless hand washing this job has forced upon me.

I was at work for 10 hours today (for some reason, I open and close the building once a week--and that means I work the whole day), and during that time I probably worked 3 hours. Now, why does this upset me? Well, because I'm the sort of person who isn't happy if they don't serve a purpose. On one hand I'm depressed because I make $20,000 a year (plus benefits) folding towels...and on the other hand my mind is fucking blown when I realize I get $20,000 just for folding towels and locking doors.

To say that I find my present job unfulfilling as well as unsavory, would be the understatement of the year. I knew my first job post-graduation would be bad (and temporary) until I could find something else...but Christ on a cracker people!!! I fold fucking towels...

Limemonkey's Life UPDATE

So I'm working (yay). That's about all I can really say about it. There isn't much to my new job, I'm a little disappointed. But that's to be expected (and actually a good thing). I'm more motivated than ever to get back to writing (soon) and keep my eyes peeled for a "real" job. But at least there is money coming in.

Inspired by the new Ringo album, I picked the ROCK BAND drums back up again today. I'm on the last set of songs (on Medium--though I can play on Hard, and actually finished a song (barely) on Expert).

That is my life...that's what's going on with me right now (exactly...boring). I work in the evenings during the week and on Saturday I open and close (9:00am to 7:00pm). I've been told Saturday's are the one of the slowest days (less than 50 people in 10 hours), so I'm toying with taking a book to read--and possibly reading the 200 pages I have written...I want to get back to working on my book, but honestly--it's been so long I need to re-read what I have to see where I was!!! Me have short memory...

Tomorrow is one of my days off, me and Leah are playing on going to the movies (CLOVERFIELD, the first time for her, the third for me). Her sister in New Mexico gave us a bunch of free AMC movie passes, so it won't cost us anything. Which is good, because we're poorer than I've ever been in my entire life...which reminds me, BURNOUT Paradise (5) came out on Tuesday (smash-em-up racing game)...I downloaded the (free) demo on XBOX Live--it f-ing rules. Becky, if you're reading this...get online and download it. It's great. Leah also pre-ordered the new SMASH BROTHERS game (for free, once she traded in a bunch of old games) for the Wii. We'll get it whenever it comes out (it keeps getting delayed).

Anyway, that's it for now. Tomorrow I'll try to write something more meaningful/insightful.

Hired!

Well, some how I ended up getting two jobs today. The first job was as a "Public Safety Officer" at the St. Louis Zoo. This was job #1. It sounded/would be cool but--it's a city job. So the hours were very small and the pay was less than $8. Still, I figured any money coming in was better than no money, so when I was offered I said I would take it.

But, I really hoped that job #2 would come through for me. Why? Well besides being full time, and having benefits, and being more of a supervisory position--it paid better. I didn't think I was going to hear back from them today (if ever really) but I just got the call--they finished their interviews and they wanted me. So I said yes. It's weird, but I'm going to be working at UMSL (I can't believe I now work for my school). I'm going to basically be in charge of the evening security at the Athletics Building (where I used to work out). I'll have part-time guards and student-workers under me. I get Friday and Sunday off (with Saturday being a morning/day shift).

If I had to work security, this is the kind of job I'd want to have. Today has been a whirl-wind for me. Somehow I pulled it off, though. I'm happy because I'll have insurance and enough money to pull my weight with the bills. Today was a good day.

2 Interviews, 1 Problem

Okay, well today was the day of my interviews. I woke up, took Leah to the airport then went home and got cleaned up. I went to my first interview (the one I was most excited about) and it went well. The lady interviewing me even told me that it went well. I then went home and watched the new FUTURAMA movie (it was actually really good). Then I went to my second, spur-of-the-moment/short notice (yesterday) interview. I went in thinking "this is going to be a crappy, low paying, part-time job."

Ah...no. Actually, it turned out to be: 1. Better paid than the first job, 2. Full-time, and 3. Loaded with all kinds of good benefits (like say..oh I don't know, halthcare--including dental and vision, personal days, vacation days. I was floored. Plus the job is a supervisor position, not "low-man-on-the-totem."

Alas, I was very much shocked, and I think that interview went well too (I was at the second interview much longer than the first). It sucks that they are both security (as I've been there/done that). However, both jobs are for cool/good companies and would probably both sustain my interest for at least 2 years. HOWEVER, there is a problem...when I got home from my second job interview, job #1 called me and offered me the job. I don't know the pay (but it will be less than #2, I assure you) and the number of hours/when I'll work is still very much up in the air. I want # 2, but it seems like #1 is a sure thing. I guess I'm going to pursue #1 and hope for #2...and if it comes through I guess I'll have to be honest and say, "Hey I'm really sorry...but I got a better offer."

Either way, it looks like I have a job (of some variety) which is good. NOW, once all this blows over I'll use names/details. I still can't believe how good #2 is. They said they'd call me sometime next week (I'm guessing early in the week because they need this position filled ASAP). But for now, all I can do is wait. And enjoy the (lonely) weekend.